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Preshrunk - no more Tommy Boy Big Guy in a Little Coat Moments

Let me See the Candy First, I'm Not Stupid - Funny T-Shirt

$28.44 USD
$28.44 USD
Sale Sold out
Shipping calculated at checkout.
Size

Money Back Policy

You no likey? Send it back! We want you to be that die hard groupie that can't stop talking about us. We'll make it right. SEE OUR FULL REFUND/RETURN POLICY HERE.

Free Shipping

Spend $99 and shipping is on us anywhere in the United States and maybe a few other places. See what the Shopping Cart does for ya. All shipping fees are calculated for every location worldwide.

100% Original

We have one super creative loco mofo birthing hilarious new designs almost every frickin day. Other t-shirt sites look like Dad Jokes and British Humor had a mutant baby. Not us. Our mutant babies are DIFFERENT!

Delivery + Returns

SHIPPING

  • It usually takes 24-48 hrs for fulfillment. We tried whipping them like third world laborers but it doesn't work. That's about as fast as they'll get it.
  • Ground shipping is usually 4 to 7 business days within the US. I mean, if we could send screaming banshees to make them run faster we would but we can't ... yet ...

RETURNS AND EXCHANGES

  • Eligibility for returns are within 30 days
  • Item must be in the same condition you received it, UNMOLESTED, UNSTAINED, with tags and in its original package.
  • You'll also need your receipt for proof of purchase.
  • We don't pay for return shipping
  • To start a return, you can contact us at sales@slappywares.com
  • SEE OUR FULL REFUND/RETURN POLICY HERE.

The Story behind this Product:

A genius friend of ours came up with this t-shirt. As adults, we should know by now that you have to SEE the candy before getting in the van. The more you know ...

T-shirts are a dime a dozen, but this one stands out from the pack. It’s super soft, breathable, and has just the right amount of stretch. Need we say more?

• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz/yd² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Guatemala, Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US


Customer Reviews

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E
Eric D'Ancicco
An added layer of protection

In a world where free candy is getting harder and harder to come by, a shirt that proclaims your lust for the sweet stuff is a must. Don't be lured into a struggle snuggle without finding out how many licks it really takes to get to the center of that mouthful of goodness. This t-shirt will get that message across. Breathable, in case Uncle Feely doesn't have the goods and you need to bolt, while also being high quality, allowing the captain of that stabbin wagon to see you from a distance increasing your odds of a score. Get one today!

Hello from Steveo!

Hi there. If you're wondering whether or not we're a real company with real people vs part of the faceless bot armies creating tone deaf joke shirts like everyone else then look no further for the truth - WE'RE AS REAL AS STUNNING TEEN ODOR AND THE MYSTERY CHOW YOUR KIDS LEFT IN THE BACK SEAT

What makes us different? We have one super creative loco mofo (me) birthing hilarious new designs almost every frickin day.

Other t-shirt sites look like Dad Jokes and British Humor had a mutant baby. Not us. Our mutant babies are DIFFERENT!

"Well, i don't get these but they're very nice."

- Mother In Law

  • PEOPLE FIRST

    We have the highest factory and workplace standards for fair manufacturing.

  • LOW WASTE

    We recycle nearly everything that can’t be turned into a t-shirt.

  • ENERGY SAVING

    Solar powered energy is used to power our manufacturing facilities.

  • WATER REDUCTION

    We use eco-friendly dyes and machines that require 7x less water.